Dec 26

What is this day for....work, play, relax or shop. Me personally it is a day to shop but hey I am working today. I must say that I would rather be doing anything but. I may shop tonight or just relax but I am going to replay Christmas Day over and over. It was great. I got really cool things new puzzles, calendars, and lots of bird paraphilnailya. No clue how to spell that word. I think though the best part of the day was watching the many episodes of LOST with hot rod and rave. We stayed in pjs all day and were just together. Those days are moving on quickly for hot rod is graduating and heading to college before I know it. People always say...me included...how we wish we could go back to when they were younger but you know what hot rod is going to do is grand and I am ready to watch, well gettin ready...I am really blessed to have all that I do and my family is fabulous.

self thought

I am here at Panera relaxing on a sunday and realizing that time goes by and people only really focus on themselves. I watched a family of 3 eat and leave their mess on the table my question is this no one served them whey do they think someone is responsible for their mess other than themselves. The direction of people as a whole is turning towards only self. I consider myself to be the servant type. I will help anyone out that i can, hold the door, tell you if your lights are on, and just anything else that means you are human. I hope that Hot Rod has the feels that Rave and I do. We are human...however I am not sure about the folks that sat across from me today.

the answer

THE POWER OF ASKING

We went to the beach and what a grand site. I have always loved the ocean, the sound of the waves and the power they possess is overwhelming to me. As I stated earlier this is a first for our family to be at the beach just the 3 of us. As we were walking down the shore looking at all the shells...Raven began to tell Logan about sand dollars, there were so many broken pieces but not a complete to be found. So as I walked along i said a silent prayer to the Lord above just asking for him to show me one, so that Hot Rod could have one. Last time I found was in 2000, when Raven and I went. So I am walking along and looking and waiting.....Rave says come on lets turn around and head back. So I turn thinking I should not I must keep looking but I turn and take no more than 10 steps and what do I see......yep a complete sand dollar about the size of a 50 cent piece. I pick it up and take to Hot Rod and say Thank you Lord for answering that prayer. I tell Logan that we may not go to church but I do not know how people can say there is not a God... I share the story with Raven and Logan with tears swelling in my eyes for now I have found for each of them a complete sand dollar....it was a great day walking on the beach with my family.

vacation....what is that

I have arrived at navarre beach with the family and i plan on having a great vacation. We have never come to the beach just us. We are in a cabin with one bedroom, a main room and a loft. We have fallen in love with the place, would love to stay a month but the dogs would miss us terribly. it is just great being here with my clan. The sand and ocean are calling so i must head out. vacation....what is that....a time to make memories with your family...nothing better

the dreaded spider

How i love the family i have. i would have given anything to be there when King Kong the spider not to be confused with the gorilla decided to invade my house. I should have no worries though or maybe I should for they were victorious without me, even if it did take Raven, Logan, and Kade to handle the situation. If you read this have them tell you the story for I can not do it justice. But for thought imagine Raven facing her fear of spiders, a yardstick, glad wrap that sticks, a glass vase, and a jumping KING KONG spider. that should give you all types of thoughts. I do love my family and the stories we create.

life

What a novel concept...we all have the opportunity to affect the people we come in contact with each day...some we nod, speak, or completely ignore.I found out yesterday that one of those people who comes into your life and just makes you laugh left this world on the 15th of June. Just 2 days after my mamaw. The Hawk was a great soul he would come into the office on 2 wheels with his grey hair and ZZTop like beard/mustache blowing in the wind. He always made my day. I will miss him terribly but I am sure he is running.

countdown

As i drove to work this morning i realized that when all is said and done there will only be one person who stands beside me and that will be raven. she will watch over me and give me exactly what i need as i push thru wednesday. no judging no expectation no nothing just her loving me as i get ready to say the final goodbye to my mamaw. it is hard for me at times to understand and grasp the concept of real love that unconditional love but i am learning what that means and where it belongs in my life...i am not sure anyone else really understands the beat i walk to except for raven.

unforgettable

today at 3:05 am the person whom i cherished and found great comfort in finally gave way to life. she was such a strong woman for me and someone that i have missed terribly for the last 10 years. she is my mamaw who has suffered with dementia and alhezimers for so long, i believe deep in my soul that is the worst death any human can suffer and the worst any family can endure. there really are no words that describe the emptiness that i am feeling and yet the peace that comes with this passing. she gave so much to me and instilled qualities in me that make me the person whom i am today. today i am tearful and push through the day but the sun will shine again and the flowers will bloom for i have some wandering jew in my yard growing that came from her yard so we will plant together always. i hope that everyone has a mamaw that gives to them what i have received from mine.....

introduction

This is a first. I am hoping this will be a great experience for me.....this is a test got to try new things at 42 or else the kid will leave me in the dust.